… or, Keeping the Romance Alive When You Have Kids.
Looking for a handmade Valentine’s Day gift idea for your significant other?
Somehow jewelry commercials airing around this time of the year would have us believe that diamonds equal romance. That love begins with a rock on your finger, and is best displayed by whatever is wrapped up inside that little padded box. Before the kids arrived, I knew they’d take up most of our energy but I had no idea they’d sap all of it. Days with no alone time with my husband turned into weeks. While I knew it wasn’t diamonds that equaled romance, I’ll admit I never appreciated how important time was together.
We soon discovered that if we didn’t mark out a date night on our calendars in pen {or, in “virtual” pen on our synched iCals} then it wouldn’t happen.
So, we did just that– scheduled date nights. As unromantic as that seems, in this day and age it’s exactly what we needed. When we couldn’t get away for our anniversary, we put the kids to bed early and spread out a picnic in front of the fireplace (yes, in August) with take-out from one of the best restaurants in the area. Champagne flowed freely, as did non-kid-related conversation.
For this Valentine’s Day, I put together a “date night” kit for my husband.
It’s a way to carry the romance of Valentine’s Day into the other months as well.
We’ve been married for 7 years, so 7 items made it into the kit. Now when we schedule our date nights, he’ll get to choose one of the items to keep our dates interesting and not fall into the same old routine. I’m going to be totally mean and make him guess what type of date each piece stands for, but here’s a cheap sheet for the blog {which he probably won’t read before Valentine’s Day, so no surprises ruined here}.
1. Lunch Date at Work (with food from favorite restaurant, delivered by me)
2. Movie on Opening Night (backstory: I HATE crowds, so I never want to do this with him. This time, I will!)
3. Take the Train into the City for Dinner (for two people that live so close the City of Brotherly Love, we never seem to do this. PS- ten points to the person who can guess which children’s movie I modeled the punched ticket after…)
4. Popcorn and Movie at Home (yes, we do this almost weekly because it’s not always feasible to get a babysitter, but this is a DATE so no laptop, no iPhone, just straight-up snuggling while watching a great movie)
5. Brewery Tour and Tasting (my man loves craft and microbrewed beers, and I can certainly appreciate them as well!)
6. Try a New Restaurant (in the spirit of getting out of our rut, try a new-to-us place to eat)
7. Go for a Hike (again, another thing we used to love to do until we had kids)
I thought it was a good mix of things he liked to do and things we both enjoy. Here’s a few ideas I didn’t add but might next year…
… and so much more, once you start really brainstorming.
You know what? Once we’ve gone on all our adventures, these pieces will become mementos of our dates. We can save them as memories, use them again, and add in new ones. Now, isn’t that worth more than diamonds? {humor me and shake your head yes here, friends…}
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domestiCate says
Great ideas! I love that you’ve already thought through it, so when the time comes, you just grab an idea and make it happen!
Since babysitters are so expensive, we worked out a trade with a friend who also has a baby. Once the kids are asleep at their respective homes, one of us babysits for the other. i.e. her husband stays home while she comes over, then my husband and I go out. Then another night one of us babysits for them. It’s free, and the kids don’t even know we’re gone.
the cape on the corner says
what a great gift, and how cute are the cues. the rock for hiking, that’s smart! i loooove taking the train into the city for a show or theatre, but i don’t usually to go to dinner. that’s a great idea, why not try that. it’s restaurant week this week, this would have been the time to go! 3 course meals for 35 bucks.
Penelope (NYC Mom Blogger) says
We make working on our marriage a fun priority…we are lucky, we have fun together 🙂
Kelly @ View Along the Way says
This is an awesome idea! We just started a new thing this year where we have a “fancy” date once a month, and we alternate taking turns planning it. When it’s “your” month, you do everything – coordinate babysitter, make room in the budget for any expenses, do all the planning – and the other person usually has no idea what’s happening until it happens. I’m so excited about our February date which was mine to plan. I’ve been looking forward to it all month! 🙂 We also do little free “dates” throughout the month, like dropping Weston at his grandma’s and getting ice cream or going for a walk or something. I LOVE your seven ideas!