Mommy (Mis)Adventures: The Mall Photos Edition

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Let’s pretend you are renovating your living room and need to get the kids out of the house for the day so you plan a few “field trips” for a certain 2-year old Noodle and 5-month old Bee.  Where would you go?

How about THE MALL.

It worked out so well last week that I attempted a mall visit again, but with a twist.

In my insanity I booked a session with a portrait studio at the mall to get our Christmas photos taken.  Why not knock something off the to-do list while I’m getting out of the way of the contractors?

Since I’m so smart (insert laughter here) I hired a babysitter to help out.  We stopped at her house first to get them all dolled up, and it actually worked.  We drove to the mall.  Noodle didn’t puke!  (a miracle; last week she let go right as we pulled into the mall parking lot.  This time I had her covered in a towel and rain jacket).  We got to our appointment on time.  They even got us into the studio within 10 minutes.

It was a workout!  But really fun.  Our hero babysitter held babies, changed outfits, propped Bee, wrangled Noodle, got the kids to smile… we left feeling really good about ourselves.  Since I’m so smart (you know I’m being sarcastic) I decided to proof the photos at home instead of waiting around to see them at the studio.

I got home and there were right there in my inbox!  Behold, the perfect Christmas photos:

Look, I know we are white.  Do you need to point out that we are THAT white?
Are we predicting Bee’s future as a Playgirl centerfold???
Paris Hilton could take a lesson from Noodle’s upskirt photo.  Always. Wear. Tights.
Almost.  Alllllmossttttt.
I have actually never seen that expression on Noodle’s face before.  Bee’s working it, though!
Crazy Train, here we come!

I KNOW.  They are awful!

I feel like I ran the 25.9 miles of a 26.2 mile marathon, stopping just short of the finish line.

Now what do I do?  Do I go back and try again?  The session is free, they just charge for the portraits.  Do I attempt to take them on my own?  I’m just don’t think I’m that talented.  Hire someone to come to our house, which costs a fortune?  Please help; how are you planning to handle holiday photos?

While you are leaving comments, how about captioning this one:

I’m thinking “deflated ballerina”.

At least one photo came out well.  But I’m sorta partial.

Okay, let’s have them: ideas for Christmas-card worthy photos, please!
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