Mommy (Mis)Adventures: The Mall Photos Edition

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Let’s pretend you are renovating your living room and need to get the kids out of the house for the day so you plan a few “field trips” for a certain 2-year old Noodle and 5-month old Bee.  Where would you go?

How about THE MALL.

It worked out so well last week that I attempted a mall visit again, but with a twist.

In my insanity I booked a session with a portrait studio at the mall to get our Christmas photos taken.  Why not knock something off the to-do list while I’m getting out of the way of the contractors?

Since I’m so smart (insert laughter here) I hired a babysitter to help out.  We stopped at her house first to get them all dolled up, and it actually worked.  We drove to the mall.  Noodle didn’t puke!  (a miracle; last week she let go right as we pulled into the mall parking lot.  This time I had her covered in a towel and rain jacket).  We got to our appointment on time.  They even got us into the studio within 10 minutes.

It was a workout!  But really fun.  Our hero babysitter held babies, changed outfits, propped Bee, wrangled Noodle, got the kids to smile… we left feeling really good about ourselves.  Since I’m so smart (you know I’m being sarcastic) I decided to proof the photos at home instead of waiting around to see them at the studio.

I got home and there were right there in my inbox!  Behold, the perfect Christmas photos:

Look, I know we are white.  Do you need to point out that we are THAT white?

Are we predicting Bee’s future as a Playgirl centerfold???

Paris Hilton could take a lesson from Noodle’s upskirt photo.  Always. Wear. Tights.
Almost.  Alllllmossttttt.

I have actually never seen that expression on Noodle’s face before.  Bee’s working it, though!

Crazy Train, here we come!

I KNOW.  They are awful!

I feel like I ran the 25.9 miles of a 26.2 mile marathon, stopping just short of the finish line.

Now what do I do?  Do I go back and try again?  The session is free, they just charge for the portraits.  Do I attempt to take them on my own?  I’m just don’t think I’m that talented.  Hire someone to come to our house, which costs a fortune?  Please help; how are you planning to handle holiday photos?

While you are leaving comments, how about captioning this one:

I’m thinking “deflated ballerina”.

At least one photo came out well.  But I’m sorta partial.

Okay, let’s have them: ideas for Christmas-card worthy photos, please!
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  1. Your captions crack me up. I love the last picture… maybe it makes the whole adventure worth it?!!! I have tried professional pictures without any luck. Like you, my kids make faces I have never seen before! I take my own, not perfect but atleast authentic!

  2. LOL, getting pictures at this age is kinda iffy. One day it’ll go perfect, the next it’s a wash. Are you primarily looking for holiday cards? If so, maybe you can get a multi photo card and put a really cute picture of each of them on it. That’s what I’ve decided we’re doing. Each child will be represented on the card, and they’ll all be adorable. As for taking them yourself, you’d be surprised how easy it is. What about a big pile of leaves in the yard, or sitting Noodle on a small stool by the fence and putting Bee right beside her? Or if you want it holiday-ish (yes I’m making up words here, lol) you can wrap up some empty boxes as props and sit them in front of them. Give them a plastic ball ornament to toss back and forth to you and it brings on the smiles. The key is taking TONS of pictures – like seriously tons.

  3. I like the pictures personally, Its pictures like that those that really capture the kids and the moment. If you were closer I have a great friend that does them at your house and is wonderful BUT since that wont due and if you feel like be risky (hehe) I would venture out again to try to get them retaken since the sitting fee is free. If all else fails, you can take them and edit on Picnik…..

  4. Your children are beautiful ! And as a grandmother of 10 and wife and mother of two photographers, let me suggest getting someone who does photoshop to help you. You have some great expressions and actually the poses are workable. I have helped with a multitude of little ones and feel your pain !

  5. As the Yiayia of these children, the pictures make me melt especially the last two. The deflated ballerina (who is hamming it up for all it’s worth) and the sweet,lovable Ben who is sooo

  6. I don’t think they are that bad. And that last one is awesome. Now that my kids are 5 and 2 professional pics just don’t pay off. I never get anything that I want to purchase so I’ve just started taking photos myself at home.

    Merry SITSmas.

  7. First, I think that they are pretty good. No one is crying, throwing up or snotting all over the place.

    Here is what you should do, buy electronic copies of the photos or use the ones that you have here on your blog then go to and create an awesome ‘fancy college’ cropping out the parts your don’t want and use the good smiles. They have some really cool Christmas colleges right now.

    It will be awesome and it really, really easy. 🙂

    Now go, check them out.

  8. We wound up going with one that looks like my daughter is rolling her eyes at the pesky brother. I decided to throw perfect out the window in favor of real life.

  9. Take em yourself. At least give it a try. Just put them in some Christmas clothes and keep your camera close throughout the day. Its worth a try and if it doesn’t work you can consider going back to the mall. I dunno, that’s my thought. I just know that I REALLY dislike those mall portrait places (even if they are free). They are ALWAYS a ton of work and I haven’t had very much luck in getting a great portrait. And all your pictures in About Us page are fabulous and I’ve seen you take good pictures before. I think you could do it!

  10. These are still cute pictures. They are dressed so cute!!! I love their expressions, actually. Really cute.

  11. They’re adorable! The kids and the pictures! Just think of what you’ll have for blackmail in years to come! I actually love the one of the two of them (the Paris Hilton shot!) and that last one is so precious. But if you’re not happy I’d agree, take them again! What can it hurt? Besides your sanity …

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